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Choices They say troubles come in threes. I ain’t a philosopher, I don’t know whether it’s always true or not, but it seems to me that’s the way it usually works out. All I really know is, I wouldn’t live the next coupla days after Herbert shut off his rock polisher over again for all the tea in China. Arbutus called me early the next morning to tell me “Bill” had tried to hit her up again over the phone. Turned out it was right before he went to the hardware store to chat with the boys there. “You waited long enough to call me,” I said. “I didn’t need any help. I gave him an earful,” she said. “And then I hung up.” She paused for a few seconds, then, “I almost didn’t call you at all.” She stopped again, like she was deciding what to say. “It was just cowardice. It was just…..I suppose you’ve heard all about it by now so…..” She took a big breath. “So anyway I promised you I’d call and I’m calling.” “Nobody told me anything, if that’s what you’re worried about.” Silence. “You shoulda called me right away, so I coulda shut him up.” “Bud……it was just stupid. I was a kid.” “You don’t have to tell me. I don’t know anything, nobody told me anything. Believe it or not, Ben and Jones can keep their mouths shut.” “I get the feeling you’re irritated with me.” “Yeah? You think so? You promised me you’d call me, and you waited till now ‘cause…..’cause you thought I might know something you don’t want me to know. And even though you think he’s told everybody else, you still aren’t gonna do anything about it, are you? Extortion is a crime, but somebody has to speak up before I can do anything.” Silence. “I didn’t think so.” “So are you and Lynn pressing charges?” She had me there. I didn’t have any room to talk. She didn’t say, “Right,” but I could hear her thinking it. “OK. Don’t worry about it. I’ll get him some other way.” “Bud……it isn’t what you think.” “I told you--I don’t know anything about it.” “It’s just because I care what you think of me more than I do everybody else.” What’s a man supposed to say to something like that? “OK.” “You’ll get him some other way. Maybe you can sic the Feds on him for tax evasion.” “Yeah, I’ll have to try that.” I suppose I coulda tried that…..but I ran outta time. Albert was tailing “Bill”. I was watching Charles’ class sing. Charles told me before we went to the school that night, not to watch him, ‘cause it made him nervous, but I couldn’t help it. Why would I wanna watch somebody else’s kid insteada my own? He did a good job, too, even though singing’s not really his strong point. Patty was there, too; we hadn’t seen her for a while. She wasn’t married to Brian yet, but she’d moved to OKC, and gotten a job there, ‘cause that’s where they were planning on living. I didn’t know what the holdup was, he’d asked her a long time ago, but it wasn’t any of my business. That’s what I got told the one time I asked about it. She hugged me first after she and Lynn came in the gymnasium door. “Hey, Bud. You been taking care of my sister?” “Trying to,” I said. “It’s tough.” She laughed. “You better. Or I’ll have to come back and beat the daylights outta you.” Yeah. “I bet you would.” Almost an echo of what I told Brian before he drove her out of town with the last of her belongings. She hugged me again before picking Becky up. It was funny, as much as we hated each other to begin with…..I kinda missed her now. I thought Arbutus said she was gonna be there, too, but she wasn’t. Charles wondered about it; I didn’t know what to tell him. After the program all the parents took their kids to the Dairy Dreme for an ice cream, to celebrate. So we did too. The kids did as much running around in the parking lot as eating ice cream; Becky got half a’ hers in her hair, and fed the rest to the dog that lived behind the place and survived on handouts. All the kids knew him; said his name was Wally. He was black and white, long hair kinda like a collie, but not as big. Friendly. As soon as we got home, I called Virginia, who ran the switchboard at night, to see if there were any messages for me. “Hey there, Bud. Albert called in just a minute ago. He told me to tell you…….he’s at Ned’s. And…..she’s there too.” “She who?” “I don’t know, I just wrote down what he told me. How was the program? I hear Mrs. Brady is real good at teaching the kids to sing.” She woulda talked to me for an hour if I’da had time. But Albert wouldn’ta bothered to leave a message at all if he didn’t think I’d be interested. “I gotta go,” I told Virginia, and then I told Lynn the same thing. “But Patty just got here,” she said. “And Becky needs a bath. Where are you going?” “It’s ok,” Patty said. “I’ll be here a couple days. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.” “I won’t be gone long. I just have to find out what’s going on.” I was pretty sure Lynn wanted to ask me if it had anything to do with “Bill”, but she didn’t. Albert was leaning against his car when I got there. “I wasn’t sure, but I thought maybe you’d wanna know she was here. She was waiting for him in her car, got out when he pulled up.” “Who? Who you talking about?” “Mrs. Larsen.” Lois. “They’re inside now. Had an argument out on the sidewalk first, some pushing and shoving, but now they’re inside.” “He shoved her around? That’s a public disturbance. Maybe assault.” “Well….” Albert hesitated. “She was doing some shoving, too. Name-calling. I figured I’d let you decide about arresting anybody.” Ok. I walked inside. Ned, behind the bar, waved and said howdy. “How’s your mother doing, Ned?” “As well as can be expected, I reckon. But thanks for asking.” “Bill” was sitting at the end of the bar, on a bar stool, facing me; he had a drink in one hand, the other was rubbing Lois’s hip. She was facing me, too, standing between “Bill’s” knees, and while I watched, he pulled her back against him, his hand moving away from her hip, sliding down her thigh, toward the inside of her leg. “Well, friend. Deputy. What brings you here? Crime-fightin’, are ya?” He laughed. He sounded drunk. “I heard there was a fight going on.” “And you thought you’d come and take care of it. Fix it right up. Make everybody behave.” He stood up and pushed his bar stool back against the wall. “Give it a rest. Come have a drink. We don’t have to be on opposite sides, you know.” His hand wandered up to Lois’s waist, and then up a little farther. He watched me when his hand covered her breast through her blouse. I looked at Lois. “Is he bothering you?” She shook her head. “I know you don’t understand. I can’t explain it to you. But I’m doing what I have to do.” “Bill” smiled. “Wasting your breath, honey.” I watched him close his teeth on the tender lobe of her ear, and I watched her wince. He yanked on one edge of her blouse, a button or two popped off. He stuck his hand inside. Massaged her. Watched me. That was all for my benefit, and I knew it. Knew it. It’d make him happy if I backed down now; and if I got pissed and started a fight, that woulda probably been ok with him, too. He just wanted me to do something. “So watcha gonna do now, copper?” he said, and laughed. “Ain’t nothing you can do. And I’m gonna do whatever I wanna do. I’m gonna have whatever I want. Whoever I want.” He pulled Lois’s head back by the hair and slobbered all over her mouth. And she just let him do it. I woulda liked to shove his head in the toilet just on principle, but if the mauling and mashing was ok with her, then it was none a’ my business. You know? “Maybe….,” he said, “After I get done with Little Miss Sunshine here, I’ll set my sights on Veronica. She seems friendly enough, and I know just how good she is where it counts. And then,” he cocked his head to the side, made sure I was paying attention, “maybe your mama’d like to spread it for me.” I knew what he was doing, but it didn’t matter. He wanted a piece a’ me, I could give it to him. I pulled Lois outta his arms and shoved her to the side. “And who knows?” he said. “After that, maybe I’ll get myself a hankering for--“ I didn’t need to hear who he was thinking of screwing next, ‘cause I figured it was me; my fist caught him on the cheekbone and didn’t put him on the floor, but shut him up, at least. He staggered, and then kinda slid along the wall away from me; I started after him. Didn’t have anything concrete in mind--had to get my hands on him, figure out the rest as I went along. Lois got in between us, in the way, so I couldn’t catch him; tried to push her out of the way, but she wouldn’t go. Hung on my arm, so he had time to duck; my fist put a dent in Ned’s wall. Tried again, tried to shake her off, threw another punch around her that didn’t land, and then another one. “Let go a’ me!” I said. She stayed right in front of me while I followed the bum across the small room, swinging at the bastard from the side; she got an arm around my neck. “Bill” was backing away, circling, unsteady on his feet, but not so drunk that I could grab him. “Don’t, please. Don’t. Bud. You don’t know what you’re doing to me.” “You sonuvabitch, get back here!” “Bill” grinned, and stayed outta my reach. I coulda got her off me if I’d wanted to let her have it, too…..but since I couldn’t do that, she was stuck to me like glue. “Please. Don’t make it worse than it already is.” “Let go! I’ll take care of him.” She shook her head. Both arms around my neck, she pressed her mouth just above my collar. “I can’t do that. Please, Bud.” She did it again. Her shirt was hanging open, she saw me glance there, and pressed closer. Stood on her tiptoes, and almost kissed me, the touch of her lips against mine so slight I might not have felt it except for the scent of her breath in my nostrils, but enough to stop me. “You have to let me handle this in my own way,” she said, the soft words against my mouth, just for me. “It doesn’t affect only me. There’s something else at stake. Someone I don’t dare risk. Please. Let me do this my way, I have the arrangements made, it’s almost done. Don’t ruin it for me.” Dammit. She knew when she won. And I got another kiss, a real one this time; she put her hands on the back of my head and took her time. I let her. I wondered about that when I was driving away from Ned’s. If it felt like she was coming on to me, I don’t think I woulda just stood there and let her kiss me as long as she wanted. But she wasn’t making a play for me, it wasn’t like that at all. It was sad. It was a sigh of resignation, an acceptance of painful fate, sorrow for things that would never happen. It was good-bye; and I didn’t figure it out till it was too late.
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